A new relationship. When do you talk about money?

I was presenting at a women’s conference recently about money and mindset.  At the end of the presentation I was asked this question.  “My daughter is in a new relationship, when she should talk to the new boyfriend about money?” 

money relationship compressed “As soon as possible!!” I said.

I continued: Just let me clarify what I mean.  You probably wouldn’t talk about your financial situation or expectations on a first or maybe even second date.  But once the toothbrush starts moving and you are planning further ahead than the movies or dinner next week; the relationship is looking a little more serious.  Maybe you are planning a holiday away together.  Whatever the trigger is for you that gets you thinking things are moving beyond the dating stage and a longer term relationship is looking likely then you need to have a conversation about money management.

Money can cause huge stress in a relationship.  It is hard to pin down the statistics, but some reports say that up to 70% of relationship breakup is due to money.  So get it out in the open early.  Continue reading

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What happens to the money when the Love dies? (Read Time 1:34)

I have been following the Ridge/Parore property relationship case with interest, not because of who they are, but because of the circumstances they find themselves in.  Once upon a time they were in love, they made some financial decisions and now the love has died, they are finding out, ‘what happens to the money when the love dies’.

The Ridge/Parore case isn’t that uncommon.  You meet someone, you fall in love and decide to start a life together.  During this phase financial decisions are made, like, who is going to be in charge of the finances.  These are either a conscious choice, or it just happens.

Things go along swimmingly and then something goes wrong and for whatever reason, you fall out of love and the relationship ends.  Now things can get a little tricky if you aren’t organised, this is where you find out, ‘what happens to the money when the love dies’.  The good news is most of the time this can be sorted without getting the judge involved, but when the trust completely breaks down (as appears to be the case here), sometimes it is the only option left.

Continue reading